You Might Be an ISP if...

  1. You know 56k means 'reliable 33.6' and 33.6 means 'reliable 28.8' and so forth.
  2. You know the win98 setup wizard by heart and can walk a user through it without even interrupting your Quake/MUD/IRC session to do so.
  3. You know where the email settings are in Internet Mail, Outlook Express, Pegasus, Eudora, Netscape Mail, Messenger Mailbox, and you don't use any of those programs for personal use.
  4. You maintain more than four websites and do not have time for a personal web page.
  5. You know all of the following people by reputation and can explain what they've done that is relevant to your world: Steve Case, Linus Torvalds, Eric Allman, Sanford Wallace.
  6. You know what TCP/IP stands for, not to mention DNS, HTTP, SNMP, BGP, OSPF, and DUN. You like acronyms.
  7. You know more ip addresses than phone numbers. Sometimes you just find it easier to type the dotted quad.
  8. You know more phone numbers to modem banks than you know phone numbers to people.
  9. You can name two web browsers other than Netscape or Microsoft's.
  10. You find telnet a helpful daily tool instead of wondering what it is for.
  11. You loathe the dancing baby and other large file attachments sent through email to unsuspecting users who can't pick them up off the server and then have to call and whine that their email doesn't work anymore.
  12. You despise Microsoft FrontPage as a web editing tool and as extensions to your webserver.
  13. You can answer the question 'is the internet broken' without laughing.
  14. You can spot the theme behind the following list: RedHat, SuSE, Debian, Caldera, Slackware.
  15. You can feel the load a server is under without actually checking statistics. It 'just isn't running right' actually makes sense.

Sent by: Joke Labs posted on 18 March 2007