Approximately Ten Excuses for Not Doing Homework:

  1. I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames.
  2. I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn't actually reach it.
  3. I have the proof, but there isn't room to write it in this margin.
  4. I was watching the World Series and got tied up trying to prove that it converged.
  5. I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy.
  6. I locked the paper in my trunk but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it.
  7. I couldn't figure out whether I am the square of negative one or I am the square root of negative one.
  8. I took time out to snack on a doughnut and a cup of coffee, and then I spent the rest of the night trying to figure which one to dunk.
  9. I could have sworn I put the homework inside a Klein bottle, but this morning I couldn't find it.

Sent by: Joke Labs posted on 07 February 2007